Have you ever had that experience when someone is just not really listening? We probably all know what that feels like - whether it's in a shop or in a relationship. Did you know there is actual power in locking eyes with someone? Putting down what you are doing, changing your posture to show your time is theirs for a little while!
Paying attention has heartwarming effects. It says
'I care about what you're saying.'
'This matters to me.'
It's a busy life. Nobody can deny the expectations that we feel. But could it be the case that we're putting the urgent above the important? Get that done, get that out of the way, see to that. I realise we can't spend all day locking eyes with our children, but could we spend more than we do?
It may well be that what they have to say doesn't always rock the world or change the day. Yet we want our children to grow up with self-confidence, to believe that they are important. One way to undermine that is to imply that what we're doing supersedes what they have to say.
Experiments have proven that if someone quietly pays attention, without butting in or finishing sentences or implying they need you to hurry up, it's life giving to the other person's thought processes. I'd add that it's life giving to their esteem.
So next time you hear your name, ask yourself, could I stop? Just for a minute?
The only thing that persuades them they're worth listening to, is listening to....